Man Rules

 

Found this funny rules on FB.  Wanted to share

AT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWN
FINALLY, the guys’ side of the story. ( I MUST ADMIT, IT’S PRETTY GOOD.)

WE ALWAYS HEAR ‘THE RULES’ FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE

THESE ARE OUR RULES!

PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!

1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.

1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU’RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT’S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON’T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.

1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.

1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:

SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
JUST SAY IT!

1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.

1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT’S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.

1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.

1. IF YOU THINK YOU’RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON’T ASK US.

1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.

1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.
IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.

1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.

1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE…

1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..
PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY ‘NOTHING,’ WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING’S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.

1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON’T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR..

1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE…REALLY.

1.. DON’T ASK US WHAT WE’RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.

1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.

1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.

1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!

1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON’T MIND THAT? IT’S LIKE CAMPING…

PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN – TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH…

PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN – TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS TRUE!

How you think about the rules?  Some do make me smiles.

I think people are learning each others from hearts.  Not from rules.  Let’s kick out all rules.  Close your eyes, feel and get to know others by your souls.  Accept others by who they are.

Hugs

 
Advertisements

24 thoughts on “Man Rules

  1. @MichellelyNg – its not bad, it is just i know this was to be funny, but i dont see the humor and there are those that really believe this is true but that just makes people be insensitive to others and perpetuate false things about the sexes.  this is true about all people and not just about men versus women and not to stereotype anyone.

  2. http://lolsheaven.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Eyes-Up-Here.jpgthe “eye’s up here – hershey’s shirt comic.http://media-stereotypes.wikispaces.com/file/view/men_woman.jpg/285533410/men_woman.jpganother simple juxtaposition of sexuality, men are on off woman are “complicated” picture while we are on the subject of humorous observations of stereotypes, there is a still viable series out here men are from mars: woman are from venus thing where in differences of the sexes however stereotypical are discussed.  in the occidental world, venus is the planet of beauty and mars is the planet red of blood and war….strength. – think about his for a moment venus is seven hundred degrees hot and two OCEANS of atmosphere thick at the ground level  pressure enough to crush and melt most inexpensive metals with sulphuric acid rain just in case someone thinks they’re strong… you try outlasting insanely hot acid…  mars on the other hand barely has an atmosphere  as in you’d sufficate if you were there even if it were one hundred percent oxygen when it is mostly carbon dixide.  most planets have a magnetosphere as in they are alive with a magnetic living core…mars also doesn’t have this making it further susceptable toexternal forces.  you needn’t wholly doubt me this is encyclopeia level information hardly in question.  so let’s look venus by degrees…if you will forgive me thant pun, is far more dangerous and deadly than any man or mars. or in short we all could temporarily terraform mars… whereas we’d die horribly I’m melting! on venus…even in suspended balloons in the atmosphere.  we’d waste away or be ccrushed on the venus by comparrison.  so, yes you can survive being a man but it takes the real pressure to be a woman. 😉  even by well known at least westernly, by stereotypes versus there very real associations.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s